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Today it strikes me as creepy that he showered with our team in our small locker room after practice.

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He wants to have his way, and it’s always the other guy who is wrong.” I was off to a rough start many miles from home.

I still play competitive squash, and he was instrumental in my early development as a player.

I looked forward to a fresh start, hopeful that a change in geography was all I needed to finally step into the potential that many saw but that had so far proved elusive.

I felt like a huge failure, though, and embarked instead on a dizzying 14-month bender.

I was slugging down drinks by myself in a Dallas nightclub just hours after leaving Deerfield for the last time, and the ensuing months were a blur of intoxication, degradation, and humiliating episodes.