So I picked up a knife, and told him it was his fault I was stabbing him. And one of us will click the shutter." Calendar Girls (2003)- "I'm kinda psychic. That's amazing." - "Well, they can tell when it's raining." Mean Girls (2004)- "Ooh! " Team America: World Police (2004) "Janice, I apologize to you if I don’t seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call 'dating.' I don’t like the feeling.
One day he tells me it's my fault he saw other women. My breasts can always tell when it's gonna rain." - "Really? I don't know much in this crazy, crazy world, but I do know that if you don't let us f--k this asshole, we're gonna have our dicks and our pussies all covered in shit!
" - "Do you know that in the last two years, l've been with eleven different women. My mother was a fifteen year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. And, oh, no, it's not okay because if they make me, if they, if they take my, my stapler then I'll, I'll have to, I'll set the building on fire.""How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building? Perhaps play a little game called 'just the tip.' Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Woman stood before God, With the middle breast in hand. ' And God created man." A Prairie Home Companion (2006)"Well, Dick, here's the deal.
Now, I don't date these girls because they're well-read. She thought it was a diet book." The Mirror Has Two Faces (1996)"The details of my life are quite inconsequential... My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. But then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler..... The center has to be at least three times bigger than this." Zoolander (2001)"Of course, we're not gonna go round (naked) paradin' ourselves in a room full of men! Do I have to wait for the door 'cause then it’s awkward, it’s like well goodnight. Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out 'cause you’re tryin' not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don’t kiss them at all? And all the while you’re just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? I must've hit a pothole." - "You don't seem too upset by what's happened." - "Of course I am. Who knows if I'll ever cum again." - "I would like to take a closer look at your bowls." - "My what? I would like to take a closer look - at your big brass bowls." - "Okay, yeah." (unzips pants) - "Thank you. When the middle one got in the way, God performed surgery. I mean, I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence. Uh, you know, I'm just a, just a big hairy American winnin' machine.
Take this down: 'I want rustlers, cut-throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperadoes, mugs, pugs, thugs, nit-wits, half-wits, dim-wits, vipers, snipers, con-men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bush-whackers, horn-swagglers, horse-thieves, bull-dykes, train-robbers, bank-robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, and Methodists! " - "No, now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time." "I went to New York University, and, uhm, I was thrown out of NYU my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final.