Well, it is because (1) they can; (2) most men are under the illusion that the women they knew back home are innocent, un-spoilt and virginal; (3) it is an ego boosting exercise in that it allows them to demonstrate to their people back in Africa that they too can bring one of their own to the US; (4) it allows some men to mask their “failures and shortcomings” since the women who are already in the US can tell where they are on the social and economic ladder. He can be sweet and loving and caring and benevolent and at the same time oppressive. In so many ways, he is a wounded animal as a result of his historical past. Even though the outside world is depriving him of his manhood, he has found a way to make part of his world his playground. As for the men who go in search of these women, well, their mindset has been discussed. These women see ghosts and dream of “bad-bad-bad-things.” Depression and identity crisis then sets in.Additionally, some men want their women to look up to them since it makes them appear more than what and who they really are (at least in the initial stages). What needs to be added is the fact that most are never happy because they got what they never bargained for: stunned, disappointed and underachieving wives who never knew about 40-60-hour work week; women who never knew there are no dollar minting factories down the street, that America is not what they saw in the movies and magazines, that America is not a world of instant riches and glamour. Those who can’t cope then leave their husbands and marriage and try to go it alone believing their lots would be better without the “extra baggage.” Big mistake, for most!
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These types of parties, whether big or small, are taking place all over the US. Therefore, yesterday’s greenhorns will become the “ever-present and ever-knowing” of tomorrow.
The immigration process can be lengthy and frustrating — depending on the petitioner’s immigration status. The innocents will lose the mist in their eyes and become like all the women that came before them.
These two sites are great fun and it's easy to spend hours to browse the profiles and send messages to people on these sites.