Since our tester was a straight woman, her experience with dating sites is weighted more toward receiving messages than sending messages.(According to a study from data off Ok Cupid, the majority of women don’t send the first message in online dating conversations.) To keep our judgments as objective as possible, we used the following definitions: Bad Messages ● Spam or a scam ● Harassing or threatening ● Obscene ● Extremely short: “Hi beautiful” ● Generic copy-and-paste: “I found many features of your profile interesting” ● A neg: “I like your big nose” ● From someone who acknowledges they’re outside your age range, but messaged anyway ● Passive-aggressive or a guilt trip: “You probably won’t respond to this, but…” ● Obviously from a bot because it’s so generic and from such a sparse profile Mediocre Messages ● Suggestive, but not outright obscene ● Only talks about your physical appearance, but isn’t lascivious ● Impersonal, but starts a conversation: “Any plans for the weekend?The actual “going on dates” part we’ll leave to you.
We found 68, from Alikewise to Zoosk, and started analyzing their user bases, functionality, quality, and cost to find our top picks.
Evaluating the robust functionality of a full-blown website against the swipe-rightness of an app was too unfair.
All four of our top sites used some sort of algorithm to match you with people you should be compatible with and interested in — and keep those “automatic nos” out of your feed.
This is the real heart of online dating (anyone could sift through profiles on their own) and some sites do it better than others.
But of course, without your voice, it’s hard for your personality to shine through in your profile.